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Blogger Hates Me!

December 7, 2013 / Calise Sellers

This is just a quick update to let those who left beautiful, endearing comments, only to have them marked as spam, know that it wasn’t me who flagged them that way. Blogger just hates me, you, orphans, puppies, butterflies and the number 6. It therefore sets out to delete all the loving, wonderful comments that you wonderful people desire to leave me. But we can fight this hexiphopia and puppy kicking! Just leave your comment again and birds will sing and skies will be sunny!

My deepest apologies for Blogger’s imbicilism (imbilicilicy?) and I always love your comments. Please keep leaving them and don’t let Blogger stop you! Hopefully they’ll get their act together as they figure out their whole YouTube/Google+ comments merge. Till then, again, my apologies, and please leave your comments again if Blogger automatically deletes them!

Much love!
Calise <3

Email Response: The Difference Between Sensors and iNtuitives

December 2, 2013 / Calise Sellers

Hi everyone! Blog interest, emails, etc. has *jumped* up lately, and I wanted to thank you all for coming to read these things I’ve poured so much of my love into 🙂 And thanks to everyone who has sent me emails 😀 it’s been great to hear from you!!! Apologies if I haven’t gotten back to you yet! I swear I will reply to everyone… but I’m a little backed up and I want to give everyone the attention they deserve… plus, you know, I still have a blog to write 😉 And laundry to catch up on…

But I really do enjoy hearing from you and replying to you, so don’t let any of that scare you away 🙂 Being correctly typed can make a world of difference in your life and I’d be happy to help… if you’re patient 😉

Emails have also shown me areas of information I could stand to cover better. For example, I had an awesome girl whom I typed as a Sensor ask me why I typed her that way, and how to tell the difference between Sensors and iNtuitives, especially because she didn’t feel good at the types of things Sensors are “supposed” to be good at. Here is some of my response (made generally applicable through the use of handy-dandy brackets), because I think these are common concerns. I said:

“Well, to start with, Sensors don’t have to be athletic and iNtuitives can be (though I’m not lol) and Sensors can really enjoy school and learning etc. and some iNtuitives don’t. I really believe that any type can get good at any skill, they don’t have to be limited to a certain branch of interests…

“Like I said last email, Sensors think in puzzle pieces, where everything has a spot and snaps into place. iNtuitives think more in a web or word-cloud [I meant word-net], where one thought connects to lots of others through little strands of patterns. They’re both equal, but they look different when you know what to look for. So when Sensors talk, they focus on a single puzzle piece, be it a situation or information of whatever kind, that’s whatever they’re dealing with at that moment, and figure out where that piece fits. They don’t have to look at all the pieces at once because they can look at pieces in isolation, without them being attached to all the other pieces. An S will pick up one ‘piece’ of information, and just evaluate that piece by itself to figure out where it goes. An N can’t pick up one part of their information ‘web’ without everything attached to it coming too; they have to orient all the strands at the same time because otherwise they have no reference point and their web totally falls apart.

“Was that a really weird analogy? So, when [a Sensor talks, they] hold up individual ‘puzzle pieces’ of topics or information, and discuss basically, ‘I have this piece. It has this picture and is this shape. Hmm… I think it goes here; do you agree?’ and [the Sensor puts] it in [their] mind where [they] think it fits in the puzzle 😀 Then [they] move on to the next piece. As long as a piece is working where [they] put it, and the picture looks like the puzzle box, [they] don’t have to worry about what all the other pieces are doing; [they] can take the puzzle one piece at a time. [They] can focus on the puzzle piece right in front of [them] (i.e. the piece of information or whatever [they’re] doing at the moment) and as long as that piece was put in the right place, it’ll line up with later pieces.”

I focused in this email on the Sensor side of it, because that was who I was talking to so the other side wasn’t especially relevant, but I’d like to elaborate on the iNtuitive version now. When an iNtuitive talks, they don’t stay in one place or on one thought. Everything is connected and one string leads to a million others. Now, this could easily be confused with the randomness of Perceivers, trying to explore a million different options. SPs can certainly be random. 😉 No, I’m talking about forays into the conceptual where every thought connects to every other, looking over the whole at once. iNtuitives will constantly be looking for how one thought applies to another and how everything fits into place based on how it connects to everything else.

Now, iNtuitives’ method widely gets viewed as more superior, which ends up causing arrogant iNtuitives and recursively arrogant Sensors, and makes everyone feel defensive of the way they operate. Like I just said, the two methods are equal, but different. Healthy, developed Sensors bring such meaning to looking at the puzzle-piece right in front of them, and I’m always in awe at the enlightenment that Sensors can pull from the world at their fingertips. Likewise, as iNtuitives appreciate and admire Sensors for their abilities and thought processes, they can better value their own abilities.

So when trying to type someone as N or S, or when trying to understand how an N or S thinks, remember:

Sensors will talk in ‘puzzle pieces’—one piece at a time, everything has a place where it snaps in, so there is no need to look at every piece at once. Emphasis is centered on correct placement of each piece, rather than on how it connects to other pieces.

iNtuitives will talk in ‘webs’ or ‘word-nets’—each piece of information connects to all the others and *has* to be viewed in context or things are missed.

Both are necessary and neither N nor S can afford to roll their eyes at the other, pretending that either context or in-the-moment-ness are invalid or irrelevant.

*We need both.*

Type Heroes: ESFJ – The Cavalry

November 28, 2013 / Calise Sellers

All the typings and observations in this post are based on definitions and information presented in the aLBoP Guided Tour 😀 So if any of it bugs you, please go read that before leaving me a grumpy comment… Or, you know what? Let’s just skip the grumpy comments! Have a nice day! <3

ESFJ
The Cavalry

“No one dressed by me ever looks like an idiot.”
Alice Cullen, The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn novel

The ESFJ Cavalry is the paragon of group experience, intent on ensuring that all involved have the best experience, and that they personally get to experience the group. They shine as the bright beacon of action-example, a lighthouse of what to be and do. Open, warm, in-the-moment and upfront, the Cavalry is a perfect blend of party and poise; an ongoing paradox of sensible bounce, colorful pragmatism, and gentle snark. To any group they choose to share their love with, the ESFJ Cavalry brings a fantastic *pop!*

What Type Am I?

November 11, 2013 / Calise Sellers

One of the most common questions I receive (along with the other questions in the header) when people find out about the work I do in personality typing is, “So… how do I know what type *I* am?”

A very valid question. How can you be happy with the way your mind works, understand its natural strengths and weaknesses and find your personality type’s unique place in the world if you don’t know what your personality type is?

Well, one option would be to take a test, either “official” or otherwise, but some are more reliable than others. If a test relies on your social habits, what your cultural background deems a worthy use of your thoughts or if it makes some types sound wildly more positive than others, get out that salt-lick and administer some grains. Since studying type theory this in depth I’ve taken a few tests. I’m always amazed how many of them feature leading questions. Sometimes I find myself answering differently from the way I know the test *wants* me to answer, just to spite the darn thing, rejecting the entire premise of many of the questions. Even when I was trying to be cooperative, one told me I was an ENFJ… If I were an ENFJ I’d have a lot more filter on my mouth, a lot less innuendo in my head and I probably wouldn’t have spent hours of my life researching possible ways to dye plastic bags (for the record I still haven’t found a way). If the type you tested as doesn’t seem to fit with the way you cognate, don’t be afraid to explore different options. Even if you do feel like the results fit, explore all the options anyway. You may be surprised what unexpected type fits you even *better* and helps you feel all the more like you don’t need to be someone else in order to be valid, useful and able to effectively take in the world in your own unique way. 🙂

Which brings us to the second option; to know and understand the types really well and match yourself with the type that fits you best. I personally think this is a good idea. Sure, you have to be honest with yourself, but you have to do that to get accurate test results anyway. Recommended reading to get a grasp on the types:

What Do All These Letters Mean Anyway?

*Updated! Definitions of the letters, common misconceptions and what makes personality typing awesome!

The Cognition Process in Stick Figures

*Highly* recommended as an intro to personality typing. An in-depth look at how each type thinks, which is really the core of personality typing. Also, it has cute stick figures, which makes everything better! 😀

Type Heroes

An in-depth look at each type as the heroes (and villains) they can be,with a myriad of examples. Because of the in-depth nature of these posts, this series is on-going and they’re not all up yet.

Paradoxitype

The paradoxical, unexpected side of personality that lies beneath the surface of every type. An essential part of understanding the complexity of human beings and the way they think.

Yes, I like to make up words. Yes, this is one of them. We liked it better than “paratype” which apparently a way to classify birds or something.

And, you know, stick around and read up. I haven’t even begun to write all I have to say about people, their complexity and the way they think… it’s a little overwhelming honestly 😉

The final option (well, I guess there are probably other options; you could flip four coins for example. I’m sure someone mathy could give you the odds of that actually being accurate…), is to ask me about it. I’m bright, capable, charming and I love your attention 😀 You don’t have to fill out any kind of questionnaire and you don’t have to already have a good bead on what type you are. Just drop me a comment somewhere on the blog or an email and tell me a little about yourself (nothing too personal required) and I’ll give you a straight-forward response on what type I think you are and why, or ask you for more information about what’s important to you and the way you think so I can more accurately type you.

Cost to you? Nothing! At least at the moment; if I get overwhelmed with requests for this, I may have to charge something, just for my time and to weed out trolls, but for the moment this service is absolutely free! 😀 I would be happy to type you so you can get started on your epic journey of self-discovery!

**Update: Turns out we were overwhelmed with requests, almost right away! It’s awesome that so many of you want to know and understand your personality types, and we want to help! There are multiple price tiers and you can get all the deets here.

Want more personalized advice about how to work with your personality type? Want help working with your personal strengths and weaknesses and appreciating what makes you special? Having trouble understanding or getting along with someone of a different personality? (I feel like I should insert as-seen-on-tv music and magic sound effects here) Well, I can help with that! Send me an email and tell me about anything you want typing advice on–aka anything about people… which is pretty much anything 😉

Cost of this special, personal attention wrapped in my lovingly typed embrace? Well, it depends, honestly, on the amount of time and attention it’ll require me. And what I think is reasonable for you and your circumstances. I’m not going to say “hey your life sucks extra so pay me more.” And if you can’t pay anything, email me anyway because I’m a pretty nice gal and we can talk about you sharing my blog with all your friends or something 😉 But I do put indescribable amounts of effort and pretty much all my time into this blog, so if you can afford it, I’m going to ask for some reasonable compensation in return for personal advice, which is *going* to be helpful.

Want help and advice on an on-going basis? Great! We can work something out and I would be honored to help you with what’s important to *you* and helping you feel valuable in every area of your life and fulfill my ENTP purpose of helping individuals reach their full and special potential!

Drop me a line and I’d be happy to help! Be sure to include whether or not you’re okay with me sharing your message anonymously along with my response so we can help other people who may be struggling with personality, just like you.

aLittleBitofPersonality (at) gmail (dot) com

Comment Response: Of INFJs, Principles of Typing and Characters that POP

November 9, 2013 / Calise Sellers

The other day, I got a fantastic comment on Type Heroes: INFJ – The Paladin by a cool INFJ named Match. In addition to comments about liking the blog in general, he brought up some great questions about why I typed some of the characters in the INFJ collage the way I did. Because it was a fantastic and well thought out comment, I thought it deserved a well thought out response. I started typing and this behemoth came out. Rather than try and fit it into like 50 comments all broken up, which would end up feeling like I was spamming everyone on my own blog -_-, I decided to turn it into a post that might set the precedent for future response posts that deserve this kind of care and attention.

I hope you really wanted that reply you asked for, Match 😀

Intro and Principles of Typing

Okay, important things first: Match is a really cool name! Can I just say that?

Also, I’m *so* happy you’re enjoying the blog! The things you said about Hercules Syndrome and the stick figure post make me feel giddy 😀 This is exactly why I write and it thrills me to know it’s working and that I’m touching individual people. That’s really my purpose as an ENTP, helping people see their own individual potential and know how to reach for it; helping people be awesome in their own unique ways 🙂

You brought up really excellent points about those individual characters. I also *loved* what you said about people making personality typing about cut-and-paste horoscopes! I couldn’t agree more. I think the one principle I’d like to bring up before going into specific character typings is that, while you’re obviously looking past the surface of types and I can tell you don’t type shallowly at all, it’s important to remember that personality types are a measure of the way a person *thinks* which ends up resulting in their actions, but *isn’t* their actions. I know you know that principle, but it’s easy to forget that when other people are judging by the surface. It’s easy to forget that two people may make the *exact same* decision for *entirely* different reasons. Make sense?
Continue reading

The Cognition Process in Stick Figures

October 26, 2013 / Calise Sellers

Though I write often about cognition patterns and how thought processes differ between each of the sixteen types, I feel like I haven’t really gotten across in full what I mean. And is there any way better to get across concepts simply and efficiently than pictures? I think there is not.

Now, I can’t make stick people like the greats, and I don’t want anyone to think I’m trying. This is just literally the best I can draw 😛 Well, pretty much… {On an interesting side-note about XKCD, I’ve noticed webcomic writers are often IP’s, especially INP’s (the author of XKCD being very classically INP). It makes sense to me that they would enjoy that format since IP’s focus on and love details; webcomics give them an opportunity to savor each moment and detail, rather than needing to get to the end of a plot arch, the way a J especially might. I could also go off about IP’s liking “Magnetic Poetry” titles such as “XKCD” or “Death Cab for Cutie” but maybe some other time…}

Everyone thinks :O It’s kind of a necessary part of being conscious. But we don’t all do it in the same way or in the same order. These differences in thought processes are what eventually translate into personality types. So here, step-by-step in pictures, is the cognition process and how it works for each type. 🙂

aLBoP Personality Tip #9

September 24, 2013 / Calise Sellers

This personality tip is a bit of a soapbox for me. One of the most common and damaging things I come across in personality typing, as well as just interacting with human beings on a normal basis, is people saying that who they are excuses being a jerk or hating everyone. I’m always incredulous about how many people imply that it’s okay for them to be mean, bossy, self-righteous or like their opinions, thoughts or feelings matter more than others’ just because they’re them. This problem is especially prevalent in T’s but I’ve met my fair share of F’s with superiority complexes as well.

Now, self-confidence is fine. My ultimate objective is for each person to feel happy, empowered and confident being themselves and not someone else. But there is a big difference between feeling content being yourself and implying that everyone that doesn’t think or act like you is weird, stupid or intrinsically flawed. There are some select ways that tending toward being grumpy or arbitrarily obstinate can be endearing (albeit undeveloped) attributes of a person’s character; being mean, dominating or manipulative however isn’t “just something [insert personality type here] does.” That’s a character flaw, not a personality type.

For more information on what all the letters mean, click here, and stay tuned for more aLBoP (a Little Bit of Personality) Personality Tips 😀

aLBoP Personality Tips #6-8: Extraverts

September 20, 2013 / Calise Sellers

Extraverts, whether Extraverted Perceivers or Extraverted Judgers, naturally excel at the parts of the cognitive process that require them to be outside themselves and gathering information from the world around them. Whether this is EP’s Observation of people as whole entities, understanding whether or not they can be trusted as sources, using either their intuition or senses outside themselves (Ne or Se), or EJ’s understanding of the individual Actions of others and the Consequences of their own actions based on applying either their thoughts or feelings outside themselves (Te or Fe), Extraverts are quite comfortable gathering information from people and the world outside themselves.

Because Extraverts prioritize those outside-themselves steps, they feel less confident making decisions if they haven’t gotten any feedback. Even a self-confident Extravert will want feedback from the outside world in order to understand the full effect of their decisions, though “feedback” doesn’t have to mean positive feedback. But Extraverts do need to beware of equating popularity of opinion with accuracy of opinion, whether for or against their own decisions.

Because Extraverts specialize at interpreting either people’s Motivations or their Actions, they are usually acutely aware of how others will react and interact with their plans and decisions. This means that they’re more likely to be aware of people as variables, but it can also make it harder for Extraverts to make decisions that will be at odds with the people they care about.

For more information on what all the letters mean, click here, and stay tuned for more aLBoP (a Little Bit of Personality) Personality Tips 😀

aLBoP Personality Tips #3-5: Introverts

September 18, 2013 / Calise Sellers

Introverts, whether Introverted Perceivers or Introverted Judgers, naturally excel at the parts of the cognitive process that require inside-their-heads, solitary thought. Whether this is IP’s understanding and coming to Conclusions about Data and situational details based on either thoughts or feelings inside their heads (Ti or Fi), or IJ’s understanding of how Principles apply to the world at large based on either applying their intuition or their senses inside their heads (Ni or Si), introverts are quite comfortable working things out within their own minds.

Because Introverts prioritize those inside-their-head steps, they naturally feel confident making decisions without external input. Even an Introvert struggling with self-confidence issues is unlikely to feel like they need others to help make their decisions. Even when an Introvert regrets or feels inadequate in their decisions, they’ll still feel like they alone have to make the decision.

Because Introverts specialize at being inside their own heads, sometimes they can get a little *too* inside their own heads and fail to take outside forces, especially the actions of others, into account in their planning. This in no way has to be a self-centered gesture and it doesn’t mean Introverts don’t consider the *effect* their plans will have on others. IF’s especially think in terms of what effect their actions will have on others. But a well-intentioned Introvert may fail to fully understand the ramifications of others’ actions in affecting their plans.

For more information on what all the letters mean, click here, and stay tuned for more aLBoP (a Little Bit of Personality) Personality Tips 😀

aLBoP Personality Tip #2

September 17, 2013 / Calise Sellers

One of the most common misconceptions I’ve come across in personality typing is the idea that Jungian/MBTI introverts and extraverts are the same thing as social introverts and extraverts. MBTI is about the way your brain works, not about your social habits, which are likely to change throughout your life depending on a number of factors.

If you come across a personality test that bases its conclusion of you on questions like “Do you like to be at the center of a room at a party or do you prefer the sidelines?”, “Would you prefer activities like shopping and partying, or do you prefer a quiet book?”, or “Do you learn better in a group or on your own?”, chances are the test is unreliable. Those answers would not only be affected by cultural and environmental factors, but also overlap N/S, T/F and J/P in a variety of ways. If anything, my INFJ can study better in a crowded room than I (as an extravert) can because I feel the need to take in everything around me, and he also tends to be less nervous in a group than I am because he’s more confident making decisions without the feedback of other people.

For more information on what all the letters mean, click here, and stay tuned for more aLBoP (a Little Bit of Personality) Personality Tips 😀