Author: Calise Sellers (Page 3 of 8)

Give a Little Personality: A Gift Guide by Type

 

Give a Little Personality
A Gift Guide by Type

Merry Christmas everyone!  Or whatever you celebrate 😉  Better late than never and as requested, we have a handy little guide for giving gifts according to personality!

Rather than a specific list of individual items, we thought it would be of more value to share with you the principles of what motivates each type and the trends we’ve noticed about what each personality enjoys!  So then this will be useful all year round and not just two days before Christmas 😛

This is our first hybrid post (woo-hoo!) with both a video and written portion (mid-term flashback *shiver*).  Watch the video for our full in-depth versions of what we think each type would like and why (with the option to skip forward 😉 It’s a pretty long video), and check out the summaries and full-sized pics below for each type at-a-glance!

 

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Q&A Quickie: Behavioral vs. Cognitive Psychology

Another very frequently asked question, today on Q&A Quickies we look at the difference between behaviors and cognition in psychology and examine the bird on my shirt.


We’re loving your questions and I’ve been hard at work on Group Dynamics: The Avengers!  (I have to say, the video is looking pretty sweeet :D)  Have a lovely weekend everyone!!

Type Heroes: INTP – The Alchemist

All the typings and observations in this post are based on definitions and information presented in the aLBoP Guided Tour 😀 So if any of it bugs you, please go read that before leaving me a grumpy comment… Or, you know what?  Let’s just skip the grumpy comments!  Have a nice day! <3

intp-the-alchemist-final

INTP
The Alchemist

“Don’t pander to me, kid. One tiny crack in the hull and our blood boils in thirteen seconds. Solar flare might crop up, cook us in our seats. And wait’ll you’re sitting pretty with a case of Andorian shingles, see if you’re still so relaxed when your eyeballs are bleeding. Space is disease and danger wrapped in darkness and silence.”
Dr. Leonard “Bones” McCoy, Star Trek (2009)

The INTP Alchemist is the situational rescuer, excelling in understanding the complexity of details and the potential of data; an endless fount of possible ways to make things better. They explore specifics and engineer solutions by finding the plot holes of real life, asking the questions others would never think to ask. And though they tend to pride themselves on their accuracy and use, there lurks within an off-the-wall, childlike quirkiness and a protective love for those whose problems they diligently endeavor to solve.

From childhood, young INTPs are thrilled by possibilities. The ultimate “Idea-Guys”, INTPs get stoked by new ways to do things and new ways to use the world around them. Where their ENTP counterparts approach the whole world with the question, “What can I do with me?,” INTPs are always looking for new and exciting ways to answer the question, “What can I do with this?”

The world for an INTP is aglow with materials that can be learned and explored in their billions of uses. Often finding fascinating ideas in the realms of science fiction or inventions that can reach the height of their imagination when it comes to what possibilities could be, little INTPs can sometimes feel like the world right in front of them little resembles the excitement of the concepts their minds can offer. As others may not appreciate the exciting options a little INTP sees all around them, the INTP may pull in on themselves, preferring to enjoy their cherished ideas on their own, rather than sharing them with others who might not value their merit.

INTPs love depth of knowledge, preferring it over breadth, loving to know everything there is to know about their area of choice. Because their minds automatically prioritize knowing the specific ins-and-outs of what works in potential situations, they love to study and understand *all* there is to know about a given field, so that no imagined situation could come up that their minds couldn’t handle. To an INTP, every situation is different and they need to understand all the possible tools they might need to use, but the world is just too big to know everything about *everything*, so their minds naturally pick the fields they care about most, to learn *everything* about some things. ?

This gives the INTP three choices.

Excelling at examining the specific bullet-points of information and data that make up the world around them, INTPs struggle to see how all those bullet-points add up to make a complete picture of the world and the way it works. The universe can be a scary place to an INTP, feeling like trying to nail down zoomed-out principles always leads in their mind to either oversimplified generalities, or a chaotic world that they can never expect to do the same thing twice. This can lead INTPs to Moriarty Fear, the resentment of the world outside their specialization, fearing that they need to specialize in *all* types of information or be rendered obsolete.

This gives INTPs their first choice; to try and imply that any knowledge or expertise outside their own specialization is useless, unimportant or not really intelligence. INTPs who take this first path feel the need to enforce the cultural stereotype that the only kind of intelligence is being good with specific conceptual data and analysis of situations, so that they don’t feel secondary to those with other specializations.

But the cultural belief and expectation for INTP to be the “smartest” of the types (whether people know the letters or not) is as detrimental to INTPs as it is to all the other types. Each type is the “smartest” in its own Type Specialization and it puts undue pressure on INTPs to expect them to be smart in all areas, when really they desire to focus on the area they love and shouldn’t be expected to be strong in every type’s specialization.

And at the same time, the focus on INTPs being mentally strong, an area that our culture equates with INTP’s fav of specific data, culturally forbids them from trying, experiencing and getting good at other areas they may want to try. My INFJ and I were startled when facial typing showed us that basketball legend Michael Jordan had the facial structure of an INTP, but it was awesome to read his quotes and reexamine his approach to basketball and recognize that INTP is truly the way he cognates. He was revolutionary in the sport because, rather than having natural physical ability, he instead was constantly trying new possibilities and specializing in exploring what made basketball work. Though he was kicked off his sophomore team for being too small, and always talked about how many shots he missed, he applied concepts of what worked in basketball scenarios to revolutionize the game and become a role model for millions of people. INTPs should feel like they have permission to specialize in *anything*, not like they can only be good at certain types of specialization.

And, of course, I shouldn’t have to mention how INTP’s smart being the “only” kind of smart makes other types feel. How underappreciated the cleverness of ESTPs are, or the insightful brilliance of ENFJs. What ISFP brings to IP situations or what ENFPs see in the possibilities of people. Each type, when healthy, is the *smartest* in what it loves. The types are a team, without any one of which, the whole thing topples.

An INTP who makes this first choice will end up in constant fear of being usurped or passed, their denial of the validity of knowledge outside their expertise making them lose perspective, and constant comparison with others spreading them thin so that they can’t even excel in their own chosen area of specialization. This INTP won’t end up feeling like the smartest kid on the block, but in a constant power-struggle that makes them feel of less worth than before.

The second option for an INTP is to accept others belittling their specializations as small, impractical, or unimportant, and for the INTP to believe that maybe the things that mattered to them really weren’t as important as they thought or felt, trying not to bother others with the possibilities and options they see all around them. It’s easy for an INTP to limit their Type Specialization to the data they deal with, rather than the things they can achieve with that knowledge and understanding. The INTP that lets themselves get disparaged about their own importance can get very down on themselves, not realizing just how much they have to offer.

But when an INTP instead gives themselves permission to delve deep into their favorite area of specific information, enjoying exploring the worlds of potential available through the information they love, when they’re willing to stand up and realize how huge the universe is and enjoy the fact that there is still so much to learn, when they’re willing to stand-up for the heroism inherent in fixing things, the INTP becomes a possibility-revealing problem-solver, quick to find a way out of any dilemma, complexly understanding and drawing conclusions about situations to use each moment to its fullest for the help and benefit of everyone around them. This is the INTP Alchemist.

The conceptual version of the ISTP Weapons Specialist, the Alchemist is the expert of possible solutions. Dr. McCoy’s infamous, “D@#$ it, Jim! I’m a Doctor, not a ________!” (engineer, physicist, escalator…) sums up the way INTPs specialize, perfectly. Whether they decide to know everything about forensic anthropology, archeology, the Force, gadgeteering, con-artistry, vampires, or rocks, the Alchemist is fiction’s go-to for conceptual expertise, finding adorable, geeking-out joy in whatever area tickles their fancy. As a Perceiver, the INTP is so much more about enjoying the options than reaching the destination, and it’s almost inevitable for our Alchemists to geek out and show us the joy of information for its own sake.

Though they can hold their own as protagonists—often of idea stories as the sage scientist or librarian thrown into the action, having to use their know-how to maneuver situations with their knowledge of ancient runes or local customs—more often the Alchemist is found as part of a team, where they can bounce off of teammates. With a dry, snarky sense of humor and an often hidden childlike enthusiasm about their treasured ideas, the Alchemist doesn’t find use in fakery and is at the ready to point out flaws in situational conclusions without a lot of sugar-coating. Though this might be a trait the Alchemist themselves may regret, as an audience there is something refreshing about a character who is willing to say it like it is, even to their friends. But what they often lack in tact, the Alchemist makes up for in dedication. No matter the time or tediousness required, when an Alchemist’s team needs their solutions, no one can pull them from their self-driven mission.

By nature, Dark Alchemists are nihilist. Though many INTPs lose perspective about the meaning in the world, as is their weakest area (Principles via Fe), an INTP turns villainous when they are threatened about their struggles to understand the world’s meaning to the point that they want to destroy that meaning for others. Usually intensely scary in their ability to cleverly and adaptively break the world around them, Dark Alchemists always have a principle bone to pick with the protagonist, bent on proving that the universe really works in the dark, meaningless way they try and demonstrate. Whether they don’t want anyone to be special, want to prove that all people are animals, or want to destroy the universe itself, they’ll always be trying to prove, “That’s what people *do!*” or other oversimplified universal principles.

But INTPs need to realize that the questions that to them may seem unanswerable, of universal scale and importance, may come easily to other types whose minds prioritize the workings behind the universe, and INTPs need to remember once again that they don’t need to do it all. To prevent from feeling like the world and life are meaningless, an INTP needs a good infrastructure of friends who respect and value their strengths, while still providing differing strengths to support a healthy Alchemist.

Alchemist or Dark Alchemist, a strong INTP is sure to be brilliantly good at whatever they choose to do, with the ability to see potential openings all around them and find solutions wherever they look.

Examples:
Male: Toby Ziegler, The West Wing
Female: Dr. Jemma Simmons, Agents of Shield
Villain: The Joker, The Dark Knight

Who are the Type Heroes? Read the intro here, and stay tuned to meet them all!

Want more information on INTP, the Alchemist?  Read their Cognitive Orientation Guidebook here.

A Follow-Up to “A Call to Action”

A follow-up to this post.

Thank you guys soooo so much!  I am so grateful to all of you who have reached out to us with love and concern and showed us just how much aLBoP means to you!!  Wow!  I’m overwhelmed with how loving and active so many of you have been!  The response has been tremendous, and while I so appreciate the monetary sacrifices so many of you have made in the last two days, I equally appreciate those who have come forward and said, “I can’t give money, but what can I do?”
Several of you, though, were hurt by feeling like maybe I was too harsh when a lot of you had had good reasons for not giving to aLBoP.  From not knowing that there even was a donate option, or where to find it, to your own financial struggles, many of you had good, well-intentioned reasons for not giving before.  While I’m truly sorry if you were hurt by the post on Wednesday, here are my reasons for posting what I did.  This is adapted from my comment response on a friend’s website who talked about how Wednesday’s post made her feel.  After I wrote it, my INFJ said it was exactly what all of you needed to hear 🙂 ~
“…That being said, even though my post hurt you, doesn’t mean it was the wrong move for me to write it and post it. I’ve gotten several responses from sweet people like you, assuming that the post was a knee-jerk response to the hurt I was feeling, rather than a calculated move that I had to work up to, that was very hard for me to stand up and do.  I’m an ENTP and it’s much easier for me to make a joke and laugh off what I’m doing as just a clever little project, than it is to acknowledge the scope of what I’m trying to accomplish. This is really hard to type at the moment! 🙂
But I need to own up to the fact that it had really gotten that bad. That the voices of the sweet people who loved aLBoP were getting drowned by the words, attitudes and actions of the loud, entitled crowd who had a personal investment in pretending aLBoP was no different than any mbti website that wants to pigeon hole people for their own enmity-filled validation.  And I truly wasn’t sure that any of you sweet people were really going to do anything about it.  I wasn’t exaggerating the doubt I had that the purpose of aLBoP was *ever * going to work.  Lack of donations just seemed like a tragic symbol to me of how little people were willing to act…
…It’s not about aLBoP as a website. Yes, if I’m going to continue (which I am), it’d be nice to be able to afford our own mortgage without help, eventually, but that’s not the point.  We’re trying to gather people who are willing to take action, change, and stand up, so that together we can actually do something to fix this culture.  We’re trying to enable the people who already want to do wonderful things in this world, but feel stopped by their own weaknesses and insecurities, or feel like the opposition to try is just too much, or those who want to do something, but just don’t know what.
You obviously want to do great things, but feel like there are distinct blockages in your way, and on top of that it seems like you have doubts about what you could do that would really make any difference anyway.  I believe that there are so many good people who want to really do real heroic things to change the world around us for the better, but most people believe that in the end, efforts to change the world end up rather futile.  And honestly, when uncoordinated and without perspective, most of them are.  But with the right tools to change oneself first, they don’t have to be futile.
I see so much depression in good people—people who so deserve to feel happy—and though I know the chemicals coursing through their bodies are real and so powerful, that doesn’t mean there is nothing to be done psychologically.  I see amazing people like ENFP Robin Williams, who spent their whole lives helping people, just to feel like their whole life’s work was futile, what with all the #*-% in this world.  And I think, ‘I can fix that!  I know how!’  People just have to be willing to listen, act and apply, which is never an easy feat.  Changing is hard.  Looking at the baggage deep within you is hard!
But if people are just willing to try, just willing to put forth the effort, even when it’s scary to step out into the darkness, then we can actually do something to fix the world!  Something that will actually work!  I’ve seen the principles work in my own life and others’ and I know I can help other people with them too.

Sorry, that was long (you guys are used to that from me ;)).  But those are the reasons I thought it was worth it to shock people into action.  I’m sorry if *you* didn’t need it and it hurt you that I thought you did.  But know that some people, possibly many, did…”

A Call to Action

 
This might be the final post on aLBoP.  I don’t want it to be.  I haven’t even finished the basic intro stuff, I haven’t done half the Type Heroes, and I have so many entire new series of posts waiting to be unveiled, which I haven’t even gotten to touch yet!  But since I already know all this stuff, what’s the point in sharing it if no one really wants to hear it, use it, and go forward and benefit from it?  If you’re not willing to take action to use what I give you, then what on earth am I doing?
 
Hundreds of emails, hundreds of comments, thousands of repins and hundreds of thousands of site views… but not $1 in aLBoP donations.  Of the hundreds of people who have left wonderful comments, I have an awfully hard time believing not one of them could spare $1 for a website they claim to love.  It makes me so happy to receive your sweet comments and emails, and I’ve felt so terrible for not yet getting back to most of you, but it’s been hard to prioritize it when not one of you has been willing to put action behind your words.  It makes me feel used, and it certainly makes me feel like very few of you, if any, are really willing to take action to apply anything I share.  If you can’t take the simple action of showing even a measly sprinkling of love for aLBoP, then what clearer message do I need?  And if you can’t or won’t take the simple action of showing genuine gratitude and support by taking advantage of a straightforward, fun, rewards-based, simple-as-paypal donation system, then how can I possibly expect you to take the far more complex and painful action of applying the principles of cognitive psychology in your lives?
 

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PPP Show and Tell: Feelers and Logic

Hi everyone!  I hope your summer (or winter, down under) is going well!  Lots of fun and informative stuff coming your way the next while, but one thing we’ve been working on a lot is Personalized Personality Typings.  Thank you if you’ve ordered one, or even if you wanted to!  This time the first two tiers of price points got sold out in 24 hrs!  So we’re sorry if you didn’t get to order yours at your desired price point this time, but when we finish this batch up, we’ll be releasing more (and if you miss that one, same dance next time!).
In the meantime, since we put so much love and care into these, and since they include so much information that we’d like to share with *everyone*, we’re starting this new series, “PPP Show and Tell”, where we share quotes from the various Personalized Personality PDFs we’ve personalized to people (enough Ps, eh?)  While we’ll never share quotes from *your* email, because obviously that’s personal, we do want to share what *we’ve* said to you.  In your PPPs, questions and things about personality typing come up that have either come up many times before (like this post’s content), or that we might not have thought of addressing otherwise, that the whole class could stand to hear.
This time we have lots of quotes from a bunch of *different* PPPs, about the common misconceptions people have about Feelers’ relationship with logic, and what defines F in general.  All these quotes happen to be by my INFJ because, even though we read through your emails, determine your type, and figure out bullet points of what you need to hear, together, he has been writing the vast majority of the PPPs themselves to free me up to write blog posts, comments, social media stuff in general, and not go out of my mind with laundry.  Also, he happens to be an excellent writer and has a sexy grasp of principles.  But, you know, that’s why I married him 😉  (Well, that and he’s a good kisser.)
I hope this clears up a lot of the comments we get regarding “That person couldn’t be a T, their decisions are too emotional,” and “That person couldn’t be an F, they’re too smart,” that make me feel :(.  And hopefully this information will help *you* feel better about the person you are personally, and help you understand others and where they’re coming from.  Because any person can be both useful and meaningful, logical and human. ~
“Now, regarding F, there is a plentitude of misconception about both F and T, to the point that both are often mischaracterized into narrow parodies that are true of only the unhealthiest people of any personality type.  Many of the misconceptions about F are in fact true of unhealthy Ts, and vice versa.  Originally and empirically, those who cognate in the way we refer to as ‘Feelers’ focus first on the meaning and significance of things, and in practice that has complex effects.  For example, a Feeler who had been led to believe that it was cooler, more fun, or in any way better or more meaningful to be a T… would place great meaning and significance on trying to behave as a T, even to the point of attempting to focus on the use of things before meaning.  But through all that, their root motive is still meaning, the meaning of themselves as a person in this case, which they feel requires them to be a T.  Different types will often do the very same things, but for very different reasons.  This is part of why it’s dangerous to type someone based only on what they do, rather than on why they do it, and this is also why attempting to change one’s own actions in order to try to behave as another type tends to result in only a mimic of the other type.”
“Remember, none of this means that you are limited to these strengths.  You can develop the strengths of all the types, of Ts, of Is, of Js, and of S-es.  But in order to gain the strengths of other types, we must first master the strengths of our own type.  If we seek other types’ strengths before first mastering our own, then our own type’s weaknesses will be left unmastered, and they will get in the way.  People who try to master the strengths of other types without playing to the strengths of their own type become merely a parody, attempting to mimic other types without truly becoming them, and trying to hide their own weaknesses without having mastered them.  But as you learn to be proud to be a meaningful F, an observant E, a thoughtful P, and a conceptually-minded N, as you learn why your own strengths are good, then you will naturally and easily begin to develop the entirely new strengths of other personality types.”
  
“…to be human is to have emotions, but frequently Ts are portrayed as being unemotional, while only unhealthy people, F or T, suppress their emotions.  The quickest way to be controlled by your emotions is to pretend they’re not a factor, thereby letting them run unattended through fields of fear, insecurity, and pessimism, usually.”
“Healthy people of all types should cultivate logic, and healthy people of all types should cultivate carefully bridled emotions, since without emotion logic loses context and perspective.  There are many unempirical stereotypes which suggest that logic is a T trait, but it is simply a trait common to all healthy types.  And an attempt to be unemotional is simply unhealthy, the same for Ts as for Fs.  Healthy Ts are not unemotional and certainly not detached from others.  Again, an attempt to act like another type without first mastering one’s own results in mere parody that fails to master the strengths of either type.
“The desire to be unemotional tends to be a very emotional desire, common among unhealthy Ts and unhealthy Fs alike, usually resulting from emotions such as fear, pessimism, doubt, or insecurity.  These negative emotions tend to hinder logic much more commonly than the more cliché, bubbly emotions do.  Negative emotions are emotions, and when we try to ignore their presence they are left free to color our vision and skew all our thoughts.
“A prime example of this is in your references to religion.  ‘[Quoted description of unhealthy religion].’  This description, which you use to refer to all religion, seems to fit only a very small subset of particularly foolish religious people.  But since this unhealthy version of one specific religious group made you feel invalid, telling people that they would go to some hell because of the person they are, which is a fundamentally invalidating thing to imagine, you have formed an emotional opinion against religion as a whole.  The logical act is to acknowledge how much the beliefs of this one group of people made you feel incredibly invalid, and then perhaps to carefully note apparent trends among other groups of people who seem to share the same sort of unhealthiness.  It is not logical, however, to make blanket statements about religion due to the negative emotions that fill your descriptions of these particular groups of people.  In short, to be human is to feel emotions, and that is good because emotions, when mastered, give us perspective and remind us of points that thoughts alone are unable to keep track of.  But the people who tend to be the most hijacked by their own emotions are those who pretend their emotions are not affecting them, thereby turning a blind eye and allowing their emotions to go unmastered.”
  
“Significance and meaning [F], when approached healthily, must be just as objective and measurable as use [T]; subjective reaction is neither F nor T; it’s simply human.  While platitudinous oversimplifications often stereotype Feeling as being irrational or subjective, that has nothing whatsoever to do with T or F; no healthy person, of any type, should indulge in irrational subjectivity, and yet all types are equally vulnerable to it when unhealthy.”
  
“This doesn’t mean you’re doomed; no type is destined to have some laundry-list of weaknesses.  It just means that _______ is a weaker area to keep an eye on.  The thing about weaknesses, however, is that if we face them, they can become stronger than if we’d never had the weakness in the first place, due to the focus that we have to put on them!  And we face them best by using the areas in which we’re strongest, rather than denying our weaknesses or trying to compensate for them.”
 
 
Learn all about receiving your own aLBoP Personalized Personality PDF here!

Comment Response: The Differences (and Similarities) Between ENTP Men and ENTP Women

I haven’t done a comment response post in a while.  I usually just comment back to the person individually, or answer their question in a Q&A, but I when Cody asked me the following question, I started responding and this post ran away from me, in the best way ;D  There is just soooo much to talk about on this subject, and what I’ve written here is just the tip of a large and beautiful iceberg.

Cody asked:
So question for you, what is the difference in your opinion, between an entp male and entp female?

Thanks Cody!  This is an excellent question!  And actually one that I could write posts on forever 😀  There are endless things I could say about the differences in male and female versions of *every* type!  I *love* gender; it’s actually one of my favorite topics ever… which goes along perfectly with your question!
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