Cognition is the result of where you naturally focus your attention, your desires, and your interests. Regardless of what your momentary desires or interests may be, each of us has certain deep, secret hopes that mean more to us than anything. While moods and opinions may change, these deepest desires are such a pure reflection of who we really are. In a world where there is so much to do, so much to experience, so much need and so many discoveries waiting to be found, we each inadvertently focus the most on some things over others. The things that we focus on most of all reflect what we want most out of life, deep down. This comes out through cognition, as the unique specialization of your cognitive type.
As the ESFJ Cavalry, perhaps nothing is more important to you than providing genuinely joyful experiences for those you love. Cognitively, you focus on taking appropriate actions (EJ) to safeguard the meaning of those you love (F) as they already are (S). This causes you to think of everything in terms of how it applies to particular, real people you know, rather than to theoretical people as a trend. What matters most to you, deep down, is taking action to create experiences that will bring true happiness, comfort, and peace to those you care about.
This places the Cavalry in a unique position of service at the head of their friends, caring intensely for the feelings of those close to them. They love to charge ahead with action for their group, and prefer to shine like a noble rider on a gleaming white steed, as a way of showing everyone how to be. For healthy Cavalry, this shining example has nothing to do with ego; it is only in the service of showing their friends what actions bring the most genuine happiness. All the stereotypical socialness, style, and charm of ESFJs are merely a result of their desire to create the most enjoyable experiences for their friends, regardless of how social they may actually feel. As the Cavalry, you don’t have to be loud or the center of attention, yet you naturally love to bring joy to your group of loved ones as it currently stands, and to improve their every experience.
None of this means that your specialization of charm and apparently perfect poise comes easy for you. You have to work at it, just as much as anyone else would. The difference between you and other types is that you care to work at this, above all else. Some may say that it’s just easier for you to always be on top of keeping up with people’s needs, but that’s not true; you simply care enough about doing what it takes to make each experience as truly pleasant as possible, that you’re willing to work much harder at it.
No cognitive type has it easy; every type has to work just as hard at their specialization as anyone else would have to. And every type has to deal with social pressure that tries to make them feel ashamed or embarrassed of their unique specialization. This pressure results in unhappiness and deep, internal conflict, as people feel tempted to ignore their specialization in an effort to not stand out, rock the boat, or look foolish or make anyone else uncomfortable. When we try to ignore our own deepest desires, the reflection of who we really are and really can be, we feel torn, frustrated, and unfulfilled.
This is why understanding our own cognition is so important! As we come to understand what we already wanted in the first place, we learn how to get out of our own way. We learn to let ourselves shine, rather than hiding our light. The world needs what each of us can uniquely offer. We need all the strengths of all the types; each is special at the same time, because each is special in a different way. You don’t do anyone any good when you hide your unique strength, even if you’re afraid it will make others feel uncomfortable. Let yourself be the Cavalry you are, charge boldly for all to see, and do it in your own personal way. As you do, you’ll naturally brighten the lives of all who shelter in your wake, encouraging them to follow your caring, charming lead.
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